My Song for Her

I swim her sea of milky silk skin

She is a sensitive cat

I am a sensitive child

I waited for her to wander into me

I crave to open her up and crawl in

I ponder how I’ll make her smile again

Like she does today will it so sadly end?

I hope I deserve her

Her mystery echoes in beautiful forests

I find her trail sometimes where the sun doesn’t reach

I find beauty and streams that flow out to a beach

Yes her tears are many, but she is mighty.

I’ll search forever to find her ocean

Climb the mountains she puts before me

Learn the secretes in her spires

I am ready to journey

I like her shoulders

The shape of her lips around her tiny mouth

Her teeth and how she bobs her head back and laughs

Almost like a hyena

I am astounded at our stars

They shine bright for us

Stronger than those city lights

We make love with all our might

Are puzzles pieces fit so perfect

I never want to break away

Tomorrow is always easier than today

As our souls become more in tune

Unity

Send your love upon the trail to all upon you that gaze

They may laugh and torment you on your mindless maze

Someday they will learn the world is not so flat

When you come back around and find them all fat

Don’t mock them when they nudge at your novelty

Find peace and welcome them without sovereignty 

Learn and let go of good words just past them in the breeze

Let fate bring them to open hearts

Like saying bless you when they sneeze

A loner am I, as I never quite fit

Followed my selfish heart and wallowed in shit

With this know that I will never look past you my friend

Here am I with open arms

Lets lose ourselves and in the morning cry together

Pick each other up and mend

Tell me with those eyes where you’ve been

Show me where you once fell and what you’ve seen

We’ve all lied to ourselves and squashed the weak

We’ve envied the ones who blossom

And killed the ones who shriek

We’ve ran from success

To hide from the needy

The time is now and forever is tomorrow

Time to share our pity and ponder on the sorrow

Its what makes us human

Its what makes you come here

Its what I seen in you that makes me strong

Its what brings a melody and helps you finish this song

She Is Inspiration

She revenues my insides and rattles them only to relief my flow
I only want to meet her half way on that dance floor
When the eyes watch us and how we adore
Each other is only and we share
We spread the sovereignty in our touch
When we embrace we are too much
Especially to those who live on lust
Forgotten are the embers of early life when we trust
I am a loner and I locate eccentric souls
They dwell in strips on silent shores
They find beauty where those find bores
We are uniquely connected and concentrated
Share you energy with me my friend
Unlock our minds and together we mend
Forever we fill ourselves and our egghead we extend
I will be here to listen to you and hold you until the end

15 things I've learned so far about life at 34.

1. Sometimes you must send a lot of love out to “many” people before you get one person to love you back
2. Always give people a chance. First impressions are so often misinterpreted and sometimes second impressions still aren’t enough. Some of the most magnificent people I’ve met may seem awful at first. Some of the worse people I’ve known charmed the hell of me when I first met them.
3. I’ve come close to dying so many times in life. I’ve survived two near fatal car wrecks, been electrocuted twice, OD’d twice, been hit by 4 cars on my bike and I once was jumped and beaten to death than found in a dumpster half dead (just for a pair a shoes, a cheap watch and a twenty dollar bill.) Still, I never feared death until I truly fell in love. Today I find myself concerned for my well being the first time just as much as hers, because I couldn’t bare the thought of being unable to look her in the eyes and touch her.
4. Its never the drug or addiction; it’s the demons inside that person that makes them unbearable. We will always have addictions, sometimes you can try to keep them at a low number or you can be like me and try to have as many as possible, but hit em all in moderation – be creative with it. If you’re an asshole you’re an asshole when you’re high and when you are sober. I think that’s where your common AA goes wrong. Teach people to get over their selves not dwell on what makes them want to get high and put all the blame somewhere else. Take responsibility for your own actions.
5. I’m a total douchebag when I drink too much. Only get drunk when you are in the safe company of other douchebags.
6. My 30s have been a time for accepting myself for all my many flaws. I am very sensitive, overly emotional, sometimes self-absorbed and a big drama queen. Learn to make fun of yourself so than you start taking yourself less serious and people around you will appreciate that. Learn to enjoy when people take the time to make fun of you or start viscous rumors. Thank people for taking the time to even think about you no matter how much bad energy they wasted spiting you. Remember everything can be turned into a big joke if you spin it the right way.
7. Give and trust and give and trust. People are gonna fuck you over forever, just know that eventually down the road when people get over themselves and pull their head out of their own asses they will thank you in the future and maybe buy you a beer sometime.
8. I love beer.
9. IPAs are my favorite and one of the best things I love about Chicago land is the delicious craft breweries, mmmmmm – Zombie Dust by Three Floyd’s sounds delicious right now. Three Floyd’s is an amazing brewery - way to go Munster Indiana!!!
10. Chicago has the worse weather in the universe. We are out of our fricking minds for living here. No wonder this city is full of a bunch of drunks, but it does take a lot of heart I have to give you that.
11. Art is about collaboration and patience. Don’t push creativity. Sometimes I quit a medium for years at a time only to pick it up again when the universe inspires me. Contribute to creation. Stop claiming to be an artist. You are nothing without an audience… your work can be all shit and you don’t even really exist without us.
12. I love Nebbia even though you haven ‘t seen it yet, maybe sometime when you leave the comfort of your favorite bar, club, social group and neighborhood perhaps you can some see it and appreciate what my collective has done with the space, but everyday it gets more beautiful and we grow stronger together. It’s built on love for creativity and collaboration; I wish the rest of the world could be.
13. Age is always relative. I’m sure many people learned some of these points 10 years before I did, but I have to say these points have came so relevant recently that I appreciate seeing them now in such great color, but I do not regret my past – not one bit. I’ve been around, down in the darkest holes imaginable and up on the highest clouds, but I’m getting over myself and I promise to be patient with you until you do the same.
14. Learn to enjoy the curves of life. Horrible, unimaginable things are ahead of us, but if we learn to keep our hearts open – you’ll see all the doors that open. The trail of life has endless obstacles and everything will happen just they way it was suppose to. The most tragic things in my life have opened doors to the greatest moments and achievements.

Into the Nebbia

The job is at hand and I am still and swollen
My hands are bleeding and bruised
You are there and I have fallen
I am on the ground and your head grazes in clouds
The earth grows quickly and before I can catch my breath
Three years pass by and your memory is hazed
I am forgotten by you; my meaning maybe lost?
I walk but my steps are silent and the direction now mazed

Blood trails let me learn where I am from
Where I have been and what I have done
When all is lost maybe I am only one
Unsung, but forever won
Because when I fall and than find my footing
I will stand again alone and be... something
Something
Something!!!
I will create a world around me
Full of... Everything
Everything
Everything!!!

Hungover Myself

My eyelids are wet curtains 
They struggle to lie over my exhausted pupils
My bed is beckoning, but I am fleeing my dreams
Soaking in the day’s desolate scenes
Listening to the nothingness of my home
My apartment is silent and soiled

The lust to clean lost long ago
Does anybody miss me as I sit in stillness here alone?

Last night the Devil joined me for dinner
We laughed over whiskey and made plans for death in winter

My ambition drowned last night in a sea of distilled spirits
As I incessantly sipped the sweet bottle with sentence
And the fire of passion ceased to burn; no more
Forever I have felt so much more than my brothers whom I adore
They spite me and whisper their mocking so elegantly

Yes I am weak; yes I am locked inside the cellar door
Its cold and full of broken mirrors
My feet are bare and I walk softly, but footprints of blood show my trail
Sometimes I look back and scrub myself off the floor
But my cuts are cavernous and the puddles… profound

Help me sleep and not dream my Angel
You see me pathetically fucking myself
Over and over again milking myself dry
To kill the pain inside
For a mere moment I can just “be”.

-Mr W

Anticipation

Tomorrow is incessantly beckoning my mind

The weekly diversions couldn’t be more beyond my desire

Though I want them more than food

Here I am; you are many miles behind a faceless phone

Your words linger in electronic messages

When you talk about letting go….

Will you let me in?

I can only swallow my expectations and grin

When someday is today; you can touch me

I will only touch you enough to make up for time

Times when faces looked upon me; they saw my secret

Only in my head

Even tainted in mysterious mirrors

They, spontaneously juxtaposed on esoteric faces

Never did I foresee; which is what I always dreamt

Deep down behind my pride is a secret strife

So close I can taste it

Another life

I ponder what you taste like

Its hard to let go; I can only be honored you will for me

So far we are

Connected we could be

I wish my words might pacify anticipation

Once I ran away very far; I found myself

I left my heart there forever

Now dust dwells upon that shelf

Your island is a place unknown to me

Can I lose myself again there?

Maybe find something

Something somewhat undefined; always there where I never knew